How to end Bible study with a bang....

Last night, we had just finished hosting our 1st bible study at our house and everybody was just about to get up and leave, when there was a big bang and an explosion of glass into the room. Somebody had thrown a rock through the glass of one of our font windows! We didn't see who did it or where it had come from. The velocity at which it was going, gives the indication that it was propelled using a sling-shot or homemade cannon etc. Tiny pieces of glass were propelled 3-4m into our lounge room. Thankfully nobody was hurt and the glass guy came this afternoon and replaced it.

Doing the dishes = serving God

I'm not talking about on a camp or at somebody else's house, I'm talking the day-in day-out in your own house type. Today I was reading an article from 'the Briefing' about drudgery (by Lee Carter). These are a few thoughts/quotes from it which reminded me again of the way I should be viewing those tasks which I feel are boring and repetitive.

'Drudgery engages us in wrestling with a world cursed - cursed to produce thorns and thistles, painful toil, seat and, ultimately, decay (Gen 3:17-19; Rom 8:20-21). As we clean, tidy, nuture, repair and maintain, we achieve a fleeting return to order and restoration, all the time knowing how temporary it will be. We long for a result - a reward- which will last, and which will not be subject to the destruction of moth and rust (Matt 6:19)...As inhabitants of a fallen word subject to frustration (Rom 8:20), we find ourselves wantint the impossible:we long for rest from the inexorable, and look for meaning in the seemingly futile, all the time fighting the fear that happiness will elude us.'

'According to Os Guinness, humble tasks are to be expected and embraced as part of the process of becoming more like Jesus:
'Drudgery is part of the cost of discipleship...We look for the big things to do - Jesus took a towel and washed the disciples' feet. We presume the place to be is the mountaintop of vision - he sends us back into the valley. We like to speak and act out of the rare moments of inspiration - he requires our obedience in the routine, the unseen, and the thankless. Our idea for ourselves is the grand moment and the hushed crowd - his is ordinary things when the footlights are switched off''

I was just thinking this doesn't just apply to the drudgery tasks at home, but also the drudgy tasks at church such as organising rosters etc.

Such a mum...

Just after I arrived at the gym this morning, the female personal trainer pointed out that I had my shorts on inside-out. I didn't actually, they are reversible and I had reversed them, without realising that the tag needed to be removed before I did this, so it was on full display making it look like my shorts were inside-out. As I was trying to explain this, the mum of one of Ben's gym friends made the comment "Oh, you're such a mum". I wasn't offended by the comment (it was said in jest), but later, while I was working out it got me thinking. The comment (in context to the cirucumstances) really reflects a common view of full-time stay-at-home mothers (FTSAHM) by society. We are commonly viewed as a lower class, with lower intelligence and other life skills because obviously we can't manage both full-time work and motherhood (or manage to dress ourselves correctly). Anyway I just wanted to say that I'm proud to be a FTSAHM and really do enjoy it (well most of the time). And today is the first time I've ever stepped out of the house where people may percieve I had my clothes inside-out.

Fresh basil pesto...

Was talking to our back neighbours on Monday afternoon and she gave us a whole plastic bag full of fresh basil that she had just got out of her garden. Apparently she doesn't use it much, but it is growing really fast and big in her garden. I was very happy to receive it because ever since I made my 1st batch of basil pesto last month, I've been waiting for there to be enough basil in our garden to make more! (I even planted a whole lot more seed to get more, but it seems to be growing very slowly). So last night I made up 3 batches of my recipe and now have 3 bottles of pesto sitting in my fridge! It tastes so much better than the stuff you get in the jar from the supermarket. And to help keep the cost down, for the nuts that go in it, I replace the pine nuts with cashew nuts (cheaper to start with and frequently on special at the supermarket).

Love language no. 3 - Quality time

So how have I gone the past week with 'Words of affirmation'...well I haven't done too bad at making a habit of saying 'I love you' to the kids whenever I leave them - although this was pretty easy to incorporate into the hug I give them before I go (which I started doing for the 'Physical touch' language). I haven't made a video yet, but still intend on doing it sometime this week. I haven't done too bad mentioning things about Ben's accomplishments, but I must admit I still haven't really done much of this with Joanna, although I am trying. One of the things I've found I'm doing that I didn't do much of before (and wasn't actually one of the specific things that I said I was going to try), is I've be using some of the times when I've been praising the kids about some behaviour and turning it into 'word of guidance'. Mainly for Ben's benefit at this stage, explaining why the certain behaviour is good and what the results of showing certain 'good' behaviour is (the kind of thing I've always done with bad behaviour/stand and think/time-out stuff, but this time for the good behaviour).

Anyway, as you know from the title of this post - this week is all about 'Quality time'. For those who haven't read the book, it is quick to point out that although there is a lot of talk these days about 'quality time' most kids are starving from it. It also isn't jumping into the quality vs quantity debate.

Quality time is focused attention - giving a child your undivided attention. When spending quality time with your child, you need to go to their physical/emotional level of development.

Being together - The most important factor in quality time is not the event itself, but that you are doing something together. You need to look for times when you can be alone with each of your children. Quality time should include pleasant, loving eye contact. Looking into your child's eyes with care is a powerful way to convey love from your heart to the heart of your child.

Sharing thoughts and feelings - As you spend time with your children, you will find that a natural result often is good conversation about everything related to your lives.
Quality conversations - Children never outgrow a need for quality conversation with parents and other adults. Learning how to communicate on this level will serve them well in their own future relationships: marriage; teach how to build friendships; how to relate to work associates; show how to process their own thoughts; communicate in a positive, caring manner that respects the ideas of others; example of how to disagree without being disagreeable. With younger children, one of the most effective times to initate conversation is at bedtime, when they are especially attentive.
Storytelling and conversations - All children love stories. During or after reading a story together, you can pause to let a child identify his feelings about the events or characters and then talk about them. This helps them to understand that their behaviour is tied to their feelings.

Planning for quality time - Ideas include: Regular mealtimes as a family are a natural event around which to plan; or overnight trips (one parent with one child). Need to plan time, otherwise it easily doesn't happen (although planning does not mean you can't have some spontaneity).

What I have realised from reading the ideas/suggestions for how to incorporate more quality time with your children, is that we aren't doing too bad, things that I wouldn't have automatically thought of as being 'quality time' are on the list including:
- including your child in your daily activities such as laundry, grocery shopping, or washing dishes.
-cook something together for a snack
- give older children cameras to record meaningful occassions (ok, so we've probably started Ben a bit earlier than what they were thinking - but he likes taking photos in general anyway)

And the things I'm specifically going to try and do this week are:
- making eye contact with Ben when he tells me something important
- ask very specific questions about Ben's day that do not have a yes or no answer
- Arrange or look for times when I can spend more one-on-one time with Joanna
- spending a few extra minutes (we already do read stories and pray at bedtime) putting each child to bed at night, including stories, talking about the day and praying together.
- make photo albums together for each child

Royal visit...

On Thursday night Ben and I had read 'Spot Dresses Up' in 'Spot's Playtime Storybook' by Eric Hill. In this story, Spot dresses up as a king with a long cape and makes a newspaper crown; Helen (the hippo) is dressed up as a princess with a crown too.
So on Friday morning Ben decides he wants to dress-up as a king, so gets me to tie Teddy's wrap around him like a cape and then asks me to make him a crown. Joanna then wanted to get dressed up (as a princess) with a cape and a crown too. They thought this was great fun and was a good way to keep them entertained during the rainy morning.

Summer time in Hamilton...

It's summer here... which means time for the annual Hamilton Summer Festival down at the Gardens. There's heaps of different stuff on, so we decided to head down there yesterday afternoon to see some bands. We missed the first one because the kids weren't awake in time, but we got there in time to see Zoh Zoh - a band that plays music largely influenced by traditional West African music. Lots of drums and loud rhythm - quite cool. After that, we got a bit of a contrast - "Big Muffin Serious Band" which use an impressively large range of sound-making devices to actually make pretty pleasant and harmonious music. Things like the one-string tea-chest bass, the ukelele, garden shears (yep!) and the vile-tin (apparently so named because it's made with a tin, and sounds vile!). Anyway, they were pretty fun.
The day looked like it might be really rainy, but it turned out to be not too bad - the grass was a little wet and muddy, but we kept ourselves dry - the kids had lots of fun!

Playing in the rain - part 2

I just got round to putting together a quick flick of the kids playing in the rain the other day.

The art of conversation making...

Simone had put a link to this blog post on her blog yesterday. I found it rather helpful considering that I find myself in the situation of not knowing many people, if any, rather regularly since we moved (which is totally expected). I must say for me that I am going to try and use this to get to know more people at church, as we find hardly anybody initiates the conversations with us (maybe because they haven't learnt the skill of conversation making).

Tutu Rock

Here's a video of Ben and Joanna all dressed up and performing a show for me.