How to end Bible study with a bang....

Last night, we had just finished hosting our 1st bible study at our house and everybody was just about to get up and leave, when there was a big bang and an explosion of glass into the room. Somebody had thrown a rock through the glass of one of our font windows! We didn't see who did it or where it had come from. The velocity at which it was going, gives the indication that it was propelled using a sling-shot or homemade cannon etc. Tiny pieces of glass were propelled 3-4m into our lounge room. Thankfully nobody was hurt and the glass guy came this afternoon and replaced it.

Doing the dishes = serving God

I'm not talking about on a camp or at somebody else's house, I'm talking the day-in day-out in your own house type. Today I was reading an article from 'the Briefing' about drudgery (by Lee Carter). These are a few thoughts/quotes from it which reminded me again of the way I should be viewing those tasks which I feel are boring and repetitive.

'Drudgery engages us in wrestling with a world cursed - cursed to produce thorns and thistles, painful toil, seat and, ultimately, decay (Gen 3:17-19; Rom 8:20-21). As we clean, tidy, nuture, repair and maintain, we achieve a fleeting return to order and restoration, all the time knowing how temporary it will be. We long for a result - a reward- which will last, and which will not be subject to the destruction of moth and rust (Matt 6:19)...As inhabitants of a fallen word subject to frustration (Rom 8:20), we find ourselves wantint the impossible:we long for rest from the inexorable, and look for meaning in the seemingly futile, all the time fighting the fear that happiness will elude us.'

'According to Os Guinness, humble tasks are to be expected and embraced as part of the process of becoming more like Jesus:
'Drudgery is part of the cost of discipleship...We look for the big things to do - Jesus took a towel and washed the disciples' feet. We presume the place to be is the mountaintop of vision - he sends us back into the valley. We like to speak and act out of the rare moments of inspiration - he requires our obedience in the routine, the unseen, and the thankless. Our idea for ourselves is the grand moment and the hushed crowd - his is ordinary things when the footlights are switched off''

I was just thinking this doesn't just apply to the drudgery tasks at home, but also the drudgy tasks at church such as organising rosters etc.

Such a mum...

Just after I arrived at the gym this morning, the female personal trainer pointed out that I had my shorts on inside-out. I didn't actually, they are reversible and I had reversed them, without realising that the tag needed to be removed before I did this, so it was on full display making it look like my shorts were inside-out. As I was trying to explain this, the mum of one of Ben's gym friends made the comment "Oh, you're such a mum". I wasn't offended by the comment (it was said in jest), but later, while I was working out it got me thinking. The comment (in context to the cirucumstances) really reflects a common view of full-time stay-at-home mothers (FTSAHM) by society. We are commonly viewed as a lower class, with lower intelligence and other life skills because obviously we can't manage both full-time work and motherhood (or manage to dress ourselves correctly). Anyway I just wanted to say that I'm proud to be a FTSAHM and really do enjoy it (well most of the time). And today is the first time I've ever stepped out of the house where people may percieve I had my clothes inside-out.

Fresh basil pesto...

Was talking to our back neighbours on Monday afternoon and she gave us a whole plastic bag full of fresh basil that she had just got out of her garden. Apparently she doesn't use it much, but it is growing really fast and big in her garden. I was very happy to receive it because ever since I made my 1st batch of basil pesto last month, I've been waiting for there to be enough basil in our garden to make more! (I even planted a whole lot more seed to get more, but it seems to be growing very slowly). So last night I made up 3 batches of my recipe and now have 3 bottles of pesto sitting in my fridge! It tastes so much better than the stuff you get in the jar from the supermarket. And to help keep the cost down, for the nuts that go in it, I replace the pine nuts with cashew nuts (cheaper to start with and frequently on special at the supermarket).

Love language no. 3 - Quality time

So how have I gone the past week with 'Words of affirmation'...well I haven't done too bad at making a habit of saying 'I love you' to the kids whenever I leave them - although this was pretty easy to incorporate into the hug I give them before I go (which I started doing for the 'Physical touch' language). I haven't made a video yet, but still intend on doing it sometime this week. I haven't done too bad mentioning things about Ben's accomplishments, but I must admit I still haven't really done much of this with Joanna, although I am trying. One of the things I've found I'm doing that I didn't do much of before (and wasn't actually one of the specific things that I said I was going to try), is I've be using some of the times when I've been praising the kids about some behaviour and turning it into 'word of guidance'. Mainly for Ben's benefit at this stage, explaining why the certain behaviour is good and what the results of showing certain 'good' behaviour is (the kind of thing I've always done with bad behaviour/stand and think/time-out stuff, but this time for the good behaviour).

Anyway, as you know from the title of this post - this week is all about 'Quality time'. For those who haven't read the book, it is quick to point out that although there is a lot of talk these days about 'quality time' most kids are starving from it. It also isn't jumping into the quality vs quantity debate.

Quality time is focused attention - giving a child your undivided attention. When spending quality time with your child, you need to go to their physical/emotional level of development.

Being together - The most important factor in quality time is not the event itself, but that you are doing something together. You need to look for times when you can be alone with each of your children. Quality time should include pleasant, loving eye contact. Looking into your child's eyes with care is a powerful way to convey love from your heart to the heart of your child.

Sharing thoughts and feelings - As you spend time with your children, you will find that a natural result often is good conversation about everything related to your lives.
Quality conversations - Children never outgrow a need for quality conversation with parents and other adults. Learning how to communicate on this level will serve them well in their own future relationships: marriage; teach how to build friendships; how to relate to work associates; show how to process their own thoughts; communicate in a positive, caring manner that respects the ideas of others; example of how to disagree without being disagreeable. With younger children, one of the most effective times to initate conversation is at bedtime, when they are especially attentive.
Storytelling and conversations - All children love stories. During or after reading a story together, you can pause to let a child identify his feelings about the events or characters and then talk about them. This helps them to understand that their behaviour is tied to their feelings.

Planning for quality time - Ideas include: Regular mealtimes as a family are a natural event around which to plan; or overnight trips (one parent with one child). Need to plan time, otherwise it easily doesn't happen (although planning does not mean you can't have some spontaneity).

What I have realised from reading the ideas/suggestions for how to incorporate more quality time with your children, is that we aren't doing too bad, things that I wouldn't have automatically thought of as being 'quality time' are on the list including:
- including your child in your daily activities such as laundry, grocery shopping, or washing dishes.
-cook something together for a snack
- give older children cameras to record meaningful occassions (ok, so we've probably started Ben a bit earlier than what they were thinking - but he likes taking photos in general anyway)

And the things I'm specifically going to try and do this week are:
- making eye contact with Ben when he tells me something important
- ask very specific questions about Ben's day that do not have a yes or no answer
- Arrange or look for times when I can spend more one-on-one time with Joanna
- spending a few extra minutes (we already do read stories and pray at bedtime) putting each child to bed at night, including stories, talking about the day and praying together.
- make photo albums together for each child

Royal visit...

On Thursday night Ben and I had read 'Spot Dresses Up' in 'Spot's Playtime Storybook' by Eric Hill. In this story, Spot dresses up as a king with a long cape and makes a newspaper crown; Helen (the hippo) is dressed up as a princess with a crown too.
So on Friday morning Ben decides he wants to dress-up as a king, so gets me to tie Teddy's wrap around him like a cape and then asks me to make him a crown. Joanna then wanted to get dressed up (as a princess) with a cape and a crown too. They thought this was great fun and was a good way to keep them entertained during the rainy morning.

Summer time in Hamilton...

It's summer here... which means time for the annual Hamilton Summer Festival down at the Gardens. There's heaps of different stuff on, so we decided to head down there yesterday afternoon to see some bands. We missed the first one because the kids weren't awake in time, but we got there in time to see Zoh Zoh - a band that plays music largely influenced by traditional West African music. Lots of drums and loud rhythm - quite cool. After that, we got a bit of a contrast - "Big Muffin Serious Band" which use an impressively large range of sound-making devices to actually make pretty pleasant and harmonious music. Things like the one-string tea-chest bass, the ukelele, garden shears (yep!) and the vile-tin (apparently so named because it's made with a tin, and sounds vile!). Anyway, they were pretty fun.
The day looked like it might be really rainy, but it turned out to be not too bad - the grass was a little wet and muddy, but we kept ourselves dry - the kids had lots of fun!

Playing in the rain - part 2

I just got round to putting together a quick flick of the kids playing in the rain the other day.

The art of conversation making...

Simone had put a link to this blog post on her blog yesterday. I found it rather helpful considering that I find myself in the situation of not knowing many people, if any, rather regularly since we moved (which is totally expected). I must say for me that I am going to try and use this to get to know more people at church, as we find hardly anybody initiates the conversations with us (maybe because they haven't learnt the skill of conversation making).

Tutu Rock

Here's a video of Ben and Joanna all dressed up and performing a show for me.

Pick-me-up pills of choice...

Are chocolate coated coffee beans for me! Lately I been feeling rather tired after lunch, so at afternoon tea time I've been popping half a dozen of these and they seem to help me get through the rest of the afternoon/evening without affecting my sleep (not to mention I like them anyway). Its also easier/quicker than making myself a cup of coffee (which I also don't really want to drink in the heat of the afternoon).

Joanna's first swimming lesson

Joanna had her first ever official swimming lesson today. It went really well, she had lots of fun. It turns out that one of the girls from playgroup is in the same class, so it was nice to have a familiar face. I am also starting to realise that Joanna has a bit more of a carefree streak in her personality (Ben is a bit more cautious/wary), which means she is more willing to try new things. She loves getting her face wet and doesn't mind going under the water, although she still hasn't got the concept of blowing bubbles (Joanna's version of 'blowing bubbles' is to open her mouth and stick her tongue out into the water, a bit like a dog lapping up water).
Ben was also very well behaved, entertaining himself by the side of the pool while Joanna and I were busy with the swimming lesson (there is a little play area with some toys to help entertain toddlers who are waiting). Hopefully a space will become available for him soon, so he can start swimming lessons too.

Villan-tines day

This is what Ben has been playing a bit since we did special stuff on Valentines day (I made it into a day of doing special stuff as a family - going out for breakfast, making special cards for each other etc.). When I first heard him talking about 'Villan-tines Day' I wondered to myself what this would be - would it be like a special day for villians where they get to do all the bad things they like to do? Well I actually played 'Villan-tines day' with him this afternoon, which involved him performing a 'Villan-tines day' show for me. This was a 'Hi-five' style show including using a headset while he was talking and involved segments including pretending to be dinosaurs, singing a song and pretending to go to the beach.

'Justification by faith' - Do you really understand it?

I've taken to reading back issues of 'the BRIEFING' while exercising at the gym. We have had a subscription on and off for a few years (currently off), but usually end up letting it lapse. The last time we let it lapse though, I was finding that for a while, the whole month would go by and I wouldn't have even opened it. It wasn't that I didn't want to read it, it was that I just didn't seem to be able to find the time/mental energy required. Anyway, while plodding away at the gym one day the other week I was thinking about how old and in general uninteresting all the magazines on offer at the gym were. And I don't know from where the thought came, but I thought, hey, I could bring my own briefing magazines and read them while I exercise!

So today I was reading an article from the January 2008 issue, entitled "On the dangers of Christian shorthand: 'Justification by faith'" by Christopher Ash. The point that struck me was where he said

'Justification by grace alone through faith alone' means 'justification by grace alone through faith alone, where faith is inseparable from repentance, loving obedience, and patient waiting'

That is the biblical picture of faith is a great deal deeper and more of a 'whole person thing' than just being primarily and essentially and activity of the mind and intellect. Real faith involves real repentance; real faith involves loving obedience; real faith involved patient waiting.

What it assured me of was that my activity as a christian is intrinsically part of faith, not a case of I have faith therefore I will now do the right thing. My works as a christian are not because of my faith (which might cause me to question my faith, if I'm not carrying out much in the way of 'good works'), they are part of it.

I also liked the reminder that my mindset should not be on experiencing blessings in this world, but living by trusting in the promises of God. It is through faith and patience that the promises are inherited.

Anyway, if my ramblings have confused you a bit I'll leave you with a nice summary that Christopher Ash gave at the end of the article.

"So when we speak of 'justification by faith', let us remember the priority of the grace of God, the absolute priority of this grace (ie. 100% grace), and the rounded picture of a faith that transforms our direction (repentance), our activity (obedience) and our longings (patience)."

Fax machine, go...

Well we finally got software sorted out and modem tweaked, so now I can fax all these forms I have been waiting to send.

Move over Mr Potato Head...Here comes Mr Balloon Head!

The playgroup craft this week was making Balloon people (Ben didn't have time to do it at playgroup, so I brought home all the bits to do while Joanna was still sleeping). This involved blowing up a balloon and sticking eyes, nose, mouth, feet and hair on. When I asked Ben if he wanted short hair or long hair for his balloon person, he said short and he wanted to cut it. So Ben proceeded to give Mr Balloon Head a hair cut! (he sees me cutting Peter and his hair every few weeks so knew exactly what to do without any instructions from me - although I wouldn't want him to be cutting my hair!). Here's a video of the cut - I was quite impressed with his manners with the 'customer'.

Going to 'Old MacDonald'

Ben affectionately refers to MacDonalds as 'Old MacDonalds' (ie. he gets it mixed up with the nursery rhyme). And his favorite item would have to be the hash browns. So much so that while driving out to the cafe for breakfast on saturday, Ben decided he was hungry and wanted food now...so he suggested "we could stop off at Old MacDonalds and get some hash browns mum". On this occasion I had to explain to him that it wasn't that far to the cafe and also we weren't going past a MacDonalds (thankfully we had already passed the local MacDonalds already - without him noticing). He did end up having a hash brown for breakfast at the cafe, so it was all good.

Creating a good corporate image...

Peter's company Endace seem to be very switched on about creating/maintaining a good corporate image. So this involves them participating in various corporate charity events. The latest on was the 'Sport Waikato - Red Mile', the proceeds of which were supporting the Heart Foundation. This involved a 1 mile fun run down the main street in the centre of the city. It wasn't a 'race', there was no place getters, just random prizes and a prize for the best dressed team (Peter's company didn't win this - as you can see their team dress was very corporate looking and boring). That said Peter was 4th across the finish line, but didn't win any of the random prizes (one of the girls did win a kayaking gift voucher).

Thickened cream in NZ...

Is what we know as 'double cream' in Oz. The thing is there is nothing in between that and what is known in oz as 'pouring cream'. When we were first buying cream here Peter and I thought it a rip off that the cream labeled 'thickened cream' was twice the price of the pouring cream. But now that we have bought some and now know it is actually 'double cream' I can understand why we pay a premium for it. So here is a simple to follow guide in case you ever find yourself having to buy cream in NZ (or the other way round, for our NZ friends):

• OZ 'pouring cream' = NZ 'fresh cream'
• OZ 'thickened cream' = NZ nothing - there is no equivalent
  
• OZ 'double cream' = NZ 'thickened cream'

The 'fresh cream' is whippable (except for the 'lite' version), it just takes longer to whip than OZ 'thickened cream'.

Love language no.2 - Words of Affirmation

So it is that start of week 2 of my 'Five love languages of children' project. First I'll fill you in on how my week went concentrating on 'Physical touch'. I didn't find it too difficult as it was more just putting some extra ? into my ? I stared giving Ben 'high fives' when praising him for doing something well or when he finished doing something I'd asked him to do. He seems to really like this (big smile, excited voice) and enthusiastically returns the 'high five', which usually means that 3 or so are done in succession. I still need to remind myself about doing this as it isn't a habit yet. I also have played tackle/tickle with the kids more this week than what I normally would, usually they were the ones to start it, but instead of saying I was 'too tired' or 'busy', I would take some time to play it with them for a bit. I have also tried to snuggle with the kids whenever watching DVDs or reading books.

This week I think is going to be a little harder. This is mainly because as my children can't read yet, I'm limited to mainly verbal forms of giving 'words of affirmation' (ie. can't write notes to put in their lunchbox etc.). Anyway to help me get a better grasp of the various different kinds of 'words of affirmation', I'm going write a brief summary of each here.

Words of Affection and Endearment: This is the 'I love you' words, expressing appreciation for the very being of a child( those characteristics and abilities that are part of the total package of a person). With young children who don't necessarily understand what the phrase means, you need to associated it with your affectionate feelings. It can then be connected regular events such as going to play or going to bed.

Words of Praise: We express praise for what a child does - either in achievements or behaviour or conscious attitudes. It is for something over which the child has a degree of control. Don't use praise too frequently as children know when it is given for justified reasons or not.

Words of Encouragement: We are seeking to give children the courage to attempt more. Very important with young children as most experiences are new. Can be used in relation to verbal development (when trying to pronounce words correctly; social development etc. Most effective when they are focused on a specific effort your child has made. When we feel encouraged we are better able to encourage our children. The biggest enemy to encouragement is anger. Children more likely to respond favourably to our ideas (rather than reject), when we use a soft, pleasant voice.

Words of Guidance: Loving guidance always has the child's best interests in mind. It's purpose is to help the child develop the qualities that will serve him well in the future. Words of guidance must be given in a positive way. To do this parents need to be looking closely at the interests and abilities of their children and giving positive verbal reinforcement of those interests (academic, etiquette, personal relationships etc.) Negative aspects of child guidance (eg. don't smoke, don't speed) can be verbalised in a loving manner.

Ok, so here are a few other specific ways I'm going to try and show love through 'word of affirmation' (one's I haven't done before or very rarely): making a habit of mentioning something specific I've observed that highlights Ben's or Joaana's accomplishments (this is something I already do a bit with Ben, but haven't really thought about doing with Joanna much); record a video telling Ben/Joanna how much he/she means to me (including a bunch of clips of us doing stuff together - they like to see themselves); make a habit to say "I love you" whenever I leave the kids.

I think it is going to be a bit harder for me this week, but I'll see how I go.

I've eaten too much sushi...

Peter made smoked salmon and avocado sushi for dinner and I ate more than I really needed to because it was so yummy (which is easy to do when you don't have to pay $2 per little roll). I am now sitting here feeling very full and don't want to move to do anything.

Cambridge is a long way.

After struggling to get going with my marathon training, I decided to just try out a long run and see how fit my bike riding has made me. So, the target was to run to Cambridge (well, Red Cherry Cafe actually, just before Cambridge) and meet Mel and the kids there for breakfast. According to Google, that's a distance of just over a half-marathon (21.5km or so). As it turned out, the run went really well - I felt pretty good the whole way (just a slightly achy knee and hips, but maybe I'm just getting old!). It took 1h55min, so that would convert to a pretty respectable HM time (for me anyway - my PB is about 1h52min I think).

I think I need a horn.

For my bike.  And the louder the better.  In the last couple of days, I've managed to come close to hitting two sets of pedestrians that have carefully negotiated their way past cars, but haven't bothered even casting a glance to see whether a bicycle might be anywhere in the vicinity.  If I hadn't been watching them very carefully, I think there would be some rather bruised and sore old ladies today...

Old trunk...

The other week I went to the salvage shop at the dump to find some containers to grow more veggies in (since I seem to have been fairly successful so far, I am motivated to grow even more). I came away with a couple of large old cooking pots (the sort you use over an open fire, with the swing handle to lift them on and off), and this old metal trunk.

The trunk cost me $25, which you might think is expensive at first, but if I was to go to Bunnings to buy a pot, I would only get something less than 1/4 of the volume of the trunk for the same price. Plus is would be made of plastic and have none of the character this trunk has. And this trunk is deep enough for me to grow root veggies in!


There is manufacturers label on the inside: R.G.Gibson: Wholesale & Furnishing Ironmonger, Manufacturer of Chimney Pieces & c. &c. I tried to find out some history on the internet...the only R.G.Gibson I could find was Robert Gemmell Gibson, and from his biography it seems plausible that it was his Melbourne based company which manufactured it.

I had it for a couple of weeks now and have just got around to drilling drainage holes in the bottom of it. I now need to get some soil to fill it with and sow some of the seeds I got from King Seeds to put in it (carrots, swede, maybe the gem squash).

Playing in the rain...

All of yesterday afternoon we were anticipating a large downpour of rain. It was brought in by a low off Queensland, so it felt like rain from home. Anyway it didn't end up arriving until just after we had finished dinner. Ben asked for his raincoat and umbrella, so he could go out in the rain (both the kids had got raincoats and umbrellas for their birthdays - thanks Andrew and Sally).

So we got these out, along with Joanna's umbrella. Joanna wasn't quite sure how to hold the umbrella up (and it is a little big and heavy for her still), so Peter had to give her a bit of a lesson of where to put her hands etc.

After a little while, Joanna decided to ditch the umbrella and just get wet, while splashing in puddles with Ben.

Saved by the list...

I know a lot of people despise 'to do' lists as they are just an endless list of jobs that they never have time to do. But I like them. I find them very helpful to organise my thoughts when I'm feeling stressed or disorganised. It helps me resolve my feeling of there's too much to get done, into small tasks which I can work my way through. It is also helpful when I have a spare 5min or so when the kids are entertaining themselves, instead of trying to rack my brain as to what needs doing quickly, I can just look at the list and easily find something quick to do. And I like being able to cross things off the list when they are done and to be able to see how much I have done, it gives me a sense of actually making progress (I think not having an expectation of getting absolutely everything that is on the list gets done by the end of the week, helps to eliminate the feeling of failure). So after making the 'to do' list the other day when I was feeling stressed, I have been able to cross a number of things off my list. I am feeling a lot more organised and feel like things are under control a bit more. Now it's time to go do some more jobs off my list...

Muggy...

It has been cloudy and muggy for the past 3 days now. We feel like we are in Brisbane on an overcast day in summer: dripping with sweat whenever we do anything, and having fans going all night. I'm glad I convinced Peter that we should bring all our pedestal fans with us, we have got them all in use at the moment.

What the boys got up to!

Well, Mel's covered what the girls got up to for their camping trip, so, as promised, here's what us boys got up to for ours!
The destination we were heading for was Waitawheta Hut (try pronouncing that one correctly, all you non-Kiwis!), which is at the end of the Waitawheta Tramway track. This is a track which follows the route of an old tramway (active in the 1920's) which was used to haul huge Kauri logs out of the forests. Because it's an old tramway, it's relatively flat and easy walking, at least compared to going up a mountain. I'd read that it was a good first overnighter for families, so I thought Ben and I should be able to manage it.
The first part of the walk is across some farmland - interesting for Ben ("look, Dad, more cow poo!"), not so interesting for me. Once we got into the Forest Park itself, the forest gradually got denser and nicer - by which time I had to carry Ben (he'd walked for about 30-45 min, which isn't too bad I guess). There'd been a few people on the track, so I was a little concerned about getting a bed at the hut - there's no booking system, so I was expecting it to be full for the long weekend, particularly as the weather forecast had been good. As it turned out, we were the first ones there for the night (arriving at 1pm). So we got to grab the spots that we wanted (bottom bunks!). After some lunch, I tried to convince Ben to have a rest on the bed, which wasn't very successful. After that, we went down to the river to have a swim - Ben decided it was too cold to swim, so he just watched me as I slipped off a rock and into the water. "Can you do that again, Dad?"
After some time hanging around the hut, watching as more and more people turned up, we had some dinner (by which time the hut was well and truly packed - there ended up being lots of people sleeping outside on the decks). After dinner we had some wine and blue cheese (well, just cheese for Ben - it's tough being 3) and then went for a stroll down to the river again to take some photos. Then it was bedtime, which went pleasantly smoothly - Ben lay in bed and chatted to me briefly before rolling over and going straight to sleep.
The morning started around 6:30 when it was light - we weren't the first ones up, which was nice. Oats porridge for breakfast and then packing up to head back down the track to meet Mel and Joanna. It ended up taking a little longer than we had planned, just because I got Ben to walk a bit of the way, which ends up being pretty slow (understandably). Ben was a little grumpy (just from getting less sleep than usual I think), but we got out happily enough.
So there you go, that was Ben's second overnight bushwalking trip - he enjoyed it, and I enjoyed it. And we both lived to tell the tale.

Flustered and frazzled...

Well that's how I'm feeling today. And I think I'm changing my mind about paperwork...it is becoming a real hassle as I have all these forms that I need to send to various organisations in Oz and the only options they give are post or fax. Really, I would have thought in this technological age more of them would have a electronic option (either email address or web form). I don't really want to post stuff as that is expensive to have to pay international post, so I am trying to work out how to fax it using the computer and our normal internet connection. Apparently there is a fax program that comes as part of Windows XP, but is not part of the standard install. So I have attempted to install it, but like anything to do with Microsoft it is painful and not a simple as they make out. Quite simply, I can't get it to install the program at the moment. I will have to wait till my tech support (Peter) arrives tonight - although it is highly likely that he will be as baffled as me as to why it won't do it simply.
I'm now going to make a 'to do' list to try and calm my brain and give some direction to my thoughts.

Photos

All our photos from our weekend are now up on our Flickr page. Peter's post about the boy's trip is coming soon.

Physical Touch...

I've started reading 'The five Love Languages of Children', after it was recommended to me by my sister-in-law. I have only read the first 2 chapters, but have decided after reading the 2nd chapter today, that it is going to take me at least 6 weeks to get through it. This is because I've decided to read only 1 of the love language chapters per week and then spend that rest of the week trying to increase the amount that I communicate to my children using this language. I think this is a good idea as it means I am not overloaded with trying to remember to do many different kinds of things with the kids all at once and also I can try a number of different things and will hopefully be able to work out which ones my kids respond to best. (Also they say in the intro that you can't really determine you child's primary love language until they are 5yrs old, so just to make sure you do them all).
So the first love language talked about is Physical Touch. From the start I don't find this one too hard as it is one that I respond to. But I think recently I have been getting too caught up with doing things to spend much time showing physical touch to my kids. So it has been a good reminder to me to take the time to give longer hugs instead of just a 'quickie' or to actually initiate the hugs instead of just giving them when Ben asks for one. The book has also made me understand that hugs and kisses aren't the only thing I should be thinking of. Other ways I'm going to try include snuggling closely together on the couch when watching DVDs; giving high-fives, have "tickle fights"; play games/sports together that require physical touch; offering to hold hands even when not necessary for safety/organisational purposes.
I already suspect that Physical Touch is one of Ben's primary love languages, but I must admit I haven't put much thought or observation into considering Joanna's. So hopefully this week will help me to start thinking about it and enjoying thinking about and showing love to my children.

Paperwork...

I usually like paperwork as it makes me feel productive, without having to expend much energy. But at the moment it is just making me a little stressed. I decided to finally get on with tackling the overflowing inbox of mail/paperwork that has been accumulating ever since we started the process of moving to NZ. Most of the mail had been opened and urgent stuff (like bills that were due) has already been dealt with. But none of it has been filed and there is a number of things that don't have a deadline that I still need to deal with and get organised (well except for the Queensland College of Teachers registration that was due to be paid by the end of December and I only just rediscovered it and therefore have had to pay and extra $20 late payment penalty).
I have doctors to register with, money to claim back from the tax department, letting the Australian Electoral commission know that we are living overseas now, cashing a cheque from Telstra (yes, I know that's a bit of a surprise), consolidating my 2 Qsuper accounts into one (why pay fees twice to the exact same company), let the tax department know my new bank details (so I can receive Kevin Rudds latest handout). And there is probably more stuff, as I haven't totally diminished the inbox.
I think the thing I don't like as much about this is where the paperwork involves me making a phone call to Australia. When I am paying by the minute for the phone call and then have to wait in phone, it greatly diminishes my motivation to actually make the call.

Ben's latest toilet training achievements...

1. Is competent at peeing in the bush, without getting wet feet.
   
2. Pees and poos on a composting drop loo accompanied by the flies - "look dad it's composting now!"
3. Consistently only using 1 pair of undies a day.
4. Takes himself off to the toilet without telling us first (includes flushing and washing hands afterwards).

Girls and Guys weekend

This weekend was another long-weekend for us with the Waitangi Day public holiday on Friday. This time we headed off to Kaimai-Mamaku Forest Park, for Peter and Ben to go on a special boys-only overnight bushwalk together; and Joanna and I to have a special girls-only overnight camp. So I'll just tell you about what Joanna and I did (Peter will have to do a separate blog about what they did).
We left home early on Friday morning, having breakfast at a cafe/diner in a little town called Morrinsville. We then drove to Dickey Flat campground, a DOC campground with vehicle access (and it's free), where Joanna and I were going to camp for the night. After Peter had helped me set up the tent, we drove Peter and Ben around to the start of the track for their bushwalk. We then went back and finished setting up camp. We then headed of to check out Waihi (the gold-mining town) and Waihi Beach (the holiday town) and find somewhere to have lunch. Waihi Beach is a typical NZ beach town with lots of bachs (holiday shacks) but not much in the way of places to eat or buy food. It also wasn't a good beach day with it being overcast with occasional showers and down on the beach was also pretty windy. So we made our way back to Waihi town and checked out the old pump-station building from the goldmine, the huge goldmine pit and the main street, ending up at the Ti-Tree Cafe for a nice lunch together. It was then back to the campsite to hang around for the rest of the afternoon/evening. Joanna was very well behaved and was happy to play while I cooked dinner and afterwards we went for a walk before bedtime.
The night wasn't so good, as while we had been out for the day, a group of about 12 teenagers had decided to set up camp next to us and proceeded to consume about 3 cartons of various varieties of alcohol between them from about 5pm until 2.30am (the biggest downside to a free campsite is there is no supervision/control of behaviour). This was accompanied with loud talking/laughing, the singing of some silly drunken pub song, and the construction of a fire (although they weren't the only ones to do this - despite about 6 signs around the campground clearly stating 'No fires allowed' - they were just the only ones to think of lighting one at about 2am, when most others were already in bed!). This caused both Joanna and I not to sleep very well - she didn't cry or just stay awake, she was just like I was rolling around a fair bit as the noise disturbed our sleep and kept waking us up.
Anyway, we survived the night and woke up at the reasonable hour of 6.30am. The morning was spent having breakfast and trying to find stuff in nice morning light to take photos of, before it was time to start walking up the track that Peter and Ben were on to meet them on their way back. They were running a bit later than we had discussed, which meant that instead of a total of a 1hr bushwalk carrying joanna (30min in, meet up, 30min back) it was closer to 2hrs. So my shoulders were a bit tired (I'd hate to have not been doing any weights at the gym!). Today was a stinking hot, clear, sunny day, so we were all ready for a nice sit down meal with a cool drink, so it was back into Waihi town and we discovered the Chambers wine bar + restaurant which had a $10 lunch menu. We then had to go back to the campsite and pack up all our gear, before driving home. We are all pretty tired (some due to physical exertion, some due to disturbed sleep), but really enjoyed our trip and are considering doing the 1-night camping thing again.

The mouth - a food storage device...

I thought after talking about Ben's latest bad habit, I'd mention Joanna's, which as the title of this post says, is storing food in her mouth. She will put food in her mouth, but if she then decides she is too full or doesn't like it, she will not swallow it or spit it out - she will just shut her lips and keep it inside her mouth. This usually leads to some drooling happening as her body produces more saliva, which she won't swallow as she doesn't want to swallow the food that's in her mouth. At first we were ignoring it as we thought she would eventually swallow, but being the stubborn girl she is, this never happens. And I have now had the sobering thought, that storing food in her mouth probably isn't good for her teeth. So I've now taken to getting her to spit it out into my hand (which is pretty disgusting for me - little bits of chewed up food, mixed with a stack of saliva) and then getting her to rinse her mouth with a drink of water. Unfortunately I haven't thought of any way to stop this habit yet.
(this is the same post as the other day, it just had the wrong author on it)

Chewing shirts...

It's a new habit that Ben seems to be forming and I really want to de-form. He get the neckline of his shirt and puts it in his mouth, holding it there with his teeth. My first thought is that this is stretching the neckline of his shirts and they are going to all start looking daggy. I have just had the though then, that maybe he has transferred some of his thumb sucking time to this shirt chewing thing. Don't know why and don't really know what to do about it except to tell him to get it out of his mouth when I see him doing it.

Open mind...

Well I went to Bible study this morning. The kids were totally fine with going to the creche and had lots of fun playing. Ben especially liked that "there were 2 big boys like me" (they were 4 yrs old). I've decided to hold out on making any opinions about the actual bible study as it was the 1st week and we are starting a new study (Ephesians). I am struggling with not comparing everything with what I have been used to for the past 3.5 years, as I know that this not necessarily going to be helpful with settling in to a new group. So I think I might give it a term and then see what I think.

Bible study

I am going to attend my first Bible study in NZ tomorrow. It is for mothers of kids who aren't at school yet. I'm not sure what to expect as far as how many mums will be there, or the bible study style which will be used, so I'm a bit apprehensive. I pray it will allow me to get to know some of the other women at church a bit better (or at all) as most of the families seem to disappear pretty quickly after the service finishes on a Sunday.

Learn to swim...

Well after much procrastination and pseudo organisation I have finally started the ball rolling for starting swimming lessons with the kids. I have just rung up and Ben is booked in for a ability assessment in a fortnights time (so they can work out what level class to put him into). Ben will be in the water without me for his lessons, and hopefully I will be able to get a lesson for Joanna at the same time (as I have to be in the pool with her obviously).

Tidy kitchen -- ahhh...

I'm not usually the best at keeping the kitchen totally clean and tidy. This is usually because I end up spending most my energy cooking stuff, which it what I love to do (not cleaning). But with the warm weather and no fly screens (they don't seem to know about them in NZ) we have been invaded by flies! We have fly trap outside and fly paper inside to try and help. And on the weekend Peter did a big clean up of the kitchen, clearing all the dirty dishes and junk and wiping all the dirty surfaces. It is nice having a clean and tidy kitchen, so I have been trying to keep it that way this week and so far it is working! Although I haven't done any baking this week.

The year is starting...

By definition the year may begin on the 1st of January, but for most of us with young kids, I don't think the year really begins when kindy/school and related activities begin. Today was the 1st Playgroup for the year for us, which means a return to the weekly post with the Playgroup craft of the week. The kids really enjoyed going and were quite happy to go off and play as soon as we got there. As you can see the craft for this week was decorating fish. There is shell pieces and glitter glued to the fish (if you couldn't work out what it was from the little picture). Btw...Joanna's is the top one (she likes using lots of glue, hence lots of stuff stuck) and the bottom is Ben's (he had a bit more a minimalist approach).

Mountain of washing...

This is the mountain of washing that I had to scale this afternoon. Now before you start thinking how grotty and disgusting this sounds, let me advise you that it was all clean washing. You see I don't have a problem with getting the dirty clothes in the washing machine (this happens every morning just after I get out of bed), out on the line to dry, or brought back in once they are dry. The bug in my flowchart/system is when it comes to putting the clean clothes back away in the cupboards. My initial fix to this bug is to try and get Peter to do it, but he usually claims not to know where the clothes live. So apart from putting away his own clothes (which he is good at doing if I've sorted them out into piles (Mine, his, Joanna's + Ben's), I usually am left to do the rest.
Today I got help from the kids - Ben took an interest in helping sort the clothes into the piles, so Joanna wanted to be involved too (of course). And Ben even went a step further carrying his pile of clothes to his room and putting away his undies all by himself and then his singlets and socks with some help/direction. There wasn't enough time to put all my clothes away and Peter still has to put all his away, so the mountain hasn't been conquered for today, yet.

Happy Anniversary to us...

Today was our 6th Wedding anniversary. We spent most the day doing the usual eg. going to church. This afternoon we all went and had a walk along the river before going to dinner at an Indian restaurant. Unfortunately with no babysitters there isn't a chance to go out by ourselves or go away for a weekend (although as I said to Peter it would have been perfect as there would have been 2 Long weekends to choose from!).

If you were wondering, yes the kids really enjoyed dinner - they ate heaps!